THE BOY IS BACK WITH TUBES OF PAINT POTS OF INK AND A HEAD FULL O' SHIT!

 

 

Due to problems with the computer ,compounded by the apparent existance of an electromagnetic BLACKHOLE which exists in the middle of our house causing our BROADBAND signals to be sucked up in to the spiralling EVENT HORIZON before being sucked with every thing else to do with phones ,light ,computers and telly's and stuff  in to the yawning chasm of the GRAVITATIONAL SINGULARITY that exists in the middle of our living room ,according to the nice B.T. telephone broadband engineer they sent out to us the other week. All the problems and achingly slow hair tearing ,teeth grindingly signals are due to this 'Black hole!'... All you out there worrying about when i shall inform and entertain you in the ways means and why's of the world and bafflements and befuddlements of 'life the multiverse and most things, you may rest easy Blackholes allowing i'm back.....Even now the keyboards playing up as the computer signal keeps freezing. The only that can stop TIM LEATHERBARROW outing his inane/insane garbage is the most powerful force in the universe, not bad eh?

WWW.FFF-IN'.COMPUTER.DEADSTOP.COM

Some of the sharper eyed of you out there will have noticed the more than usual irregular examples of rantings and ravings and all round blatherings lately. This is partly due to a severe case of pure unadulterated bone idleness on my part. But when ,with a superhuman burst of effort i dragged my lazy arse to the drawing board and got to it. When i'd finally produced something. I'm not saying it was worth the effort of producing it, or, for that matter of reading it. But it took time so that was your lot. wether you liked it or not. I sat at the computer to post the rubbish on the blog. But the computer just wasnt having it. I'm no fan of computers but a critical computer! I'm not standing for that. The internet and world wide web,etc,etc are very wonderful and clever things. The whole planet connected by photons and electrons whizzing about at almost the speed of light. Except here. Our computers photons and electrons dont so much whizz as move with the speed of a peanut sinking in a bowl of porridge. In our hi- speed age ,our computer harks back to a slower more relaxed time .

The slow workings of the computer can be forgiven, as me n' it are very similar and are alike in lots of ways. But what drives me up the wall is when it comes to a dead stop. As the computer screen freezes and i cant change pages ,move it up down across or shake it all about. Its inanimation gets me animated, into a totally psychotic rage .Where i want to smash and destroy and kill this already dead machine 'stone dead'. Then theres a slight flicker and the damn thing works up until the next hiccup. It has become a battle of wills with me n' the computer. If for a moment i let my guard down and show satisfaction with the computers progress. It will pounce and cut out on me. I have to intimidate it from start to finish. I sit in front with a CLINT EASTWOOD squint(Post DIRTY HARRY mid 1970's, best Eastwood squinting years.) and hopefully i'll get lucky with that punk computer.

READING COMICS ON THE 'BOG', GOES HI-TECH !

One of the great joys and pleasures of life is locking yourself in the toilet, seating yourself comfortably on the 'bog' and reading a comic or tabloid newspaper. Cartoonists are the main offenders and are the only people i've seen with magazine racks and bookcases in the smallest room. But that is about to change. Hi-Technology is coming to the Lavvy!....

If you look to the list of links on the side of the blog page . One of the list is for a pair who call themselves DARREN & DISHI (darren.phillips7@ntlworld.com)......They produce computer discs of all the comic characters you could ever think of. For a couple of quid you get hundreds of issues, annuals and specials of 'whoever' from Superman and Batman to Spiderman and The X-men and millions more. I've spent months plowing through the collection of comics ,curled up on the couch with the lap top. And recently, much as i would never have believed it until recently. I have sat reading comics on the 'bog' from my laptop. The time spent is gradually getting longer and longer and the seat ring on my backside is taking longer and longer to disappear between 'visits'. There is now an extension lead constantly ready in case of emergency on the landing outside the 'Lavvy'. This is in case the lap-top battery goes flat and i need to connect the charger. I mean you cant be left locked in the 'Kharzi' with a flat battery and Magneto on the verge of destroying The X-Men; Doctor Doom annihalating the Fantastic Four; The Green Goblin murdering Spiderman; The Joker doing for Batman, etc,etc.....Jeez! it doesn't bear thinking about.

DARREN & DISHI are well worth getting in touch with ,they'll send you a list of all the titles available and its amazing ,tell 'em you read about it here. I still like comics with paper and staples and no one can replace the boxloads in the attic. But i'm now doing my bit for the planet . Reading about all these heroes saving the planet, by having hundreds of comics on a little cd disc, rather than a 40 foot pile of paper and staples.