DO ALL YOU OLD SCHOOLBOYS REMEMBER CONVERSATIONS THAT WENT LIKE THIS:"GOT!GOT!GOT!..NOT GOT!..GOT!..NOT GOT!"..Ad infinitum!

All schoolboys of a time long gone who are now middle aged ol' farts remember when they all collected 'CARDS!'....A collection of various heroes ,TARZAN,BATMAN,etc and various telly series ,'THE MAN FROM U.N.C.L.E.'. etc Even tea had cards, in the packet 'P.G.TIPS used to regulary do it. In fact i still have 'THE RACE INTO SPACE' collection and album, as well as the 'SUN' newspaper's 3D football slbum with a wonderful RIGBY cartoon in it which i still have the remains of.

Every playground used to have groups of schoolboys huddled together as one of them with the cards flicking through them like an old western card shark, like Doc Halliday playing poker in Dodge City. The other lads peering 'goggle-eyed' at the collection whizzing past their eyes, but the main thing was the mode of communication was the thing that everybody remembers. This was brought back to me by way of   an advert for something on the radio and some kid was doing this ,which brought these wonderful memories tumbling back and had me laughing like an idiot on and off throughout the day!

Remember the cards came out and the lightening shuffle started ,but you kept up with ease telling which you had and didn't have ,so you could 'DO SWOPSIES!'....It was simply......"got! got! got!got!..not got!...not got! got!got!got!got!got!   not got! got!got!got!  not got!..not got!..not got!..not got!got! got!got!got!got!..not got!got!got!got!got!got!got!got!got...Not got!...got!..not got!..Not got!..not got!...not got!..got!got!got!..not got!..got!got!got!got!got!got!..not got!got!got!...not got!  got!..not got!..got!got!got!got!...not got!..not got!..not got!  got!got!got!got!not got!  got! got! got!got!got!  not got!got!.......And on it goes,or went, the excitment of this business transaction was palpable, Scabby sweaty, snotty schoolboys were bad enough, but scabby,sweaty,snotty,highly excited school boys were even worse...Ah happy days weren't we sad n' simple with our cards n' comics!

THE THREE MOST HORRIBLE WORDS FOR ANY CARICATURIST !!

Being a fine upstanding pillock of the community, i find myself being at the behest of the said community , esspecially since the little 'un's old school, with the help of the 'Little 'un' and the Lovely Lynne found out what a wonderfully gifted and talented cartoonist and caricaturist i am. This combined with, apparently me being a wonderful human being who would do anything for anyone???????????..........Well, this got me volunteered by my beloved family to draw hundreds and hundreds of kids at various summer fairs and so such 'do's'. This spread to the scouts functions and general charity functions. Jeez! its hard work being wonderful.

It always started with a telephone call to the lovely Lynne and i would hear the words WORK, CHARITY and FREE...It didn't matter where i was in the house ,or even if i was a mile away walking the dog, i would still hear THOSE words!!!. It meant i was being volunteered again!

The ironical thing is that everybody goes to the lovely Lynne to see if i'll 'do it!'.... Even if i answer the phone they'll ask to speak to the Lovely Lynne. She'll volunteer me ("Of course he'll do it, we're doing nothing that day" ).... After the day is over and the school or scout newsletter, or whatever comes out, there'll be a nice "Thank you"......For the Lovely Lynne for her help.

The other week , the lovely Lynne's sister , the exotic Elaine called and those words that chill any caricaturist to the bone...WORK...CHARITY...FREE...(My ink tinted blood is curdling even as my trembling hands type at this)..... came out as the Lovely Lynne spoke on the phone, i couldn't finish my X-MEN comic ,even. So, a week or so later i was away in the Cheshire countryside freezing me cobblers off drawing at a special needs school......Aaaah maybe i am wonderful..... The words will always have the same affect on me ,but i'll keep on letting the Lovely Lynne volunteer me. I'm still not talking to the exotic Elaine tho', much to her amusement.