Wednesday 12 May 2010

IN WHATS LEFT OF OUR LIVERPOOL HOME;WE SPEAK WITH AN ACCENT EXCEEDINGLY RARE;LIVE UNDER A STATUE ,EXCEEDINGLY BARE,WELL WE DID ,BUT HE'S GOT TO GO...

AND THE LIVERBIRDS COULD BE THE NEXT TO GO!
One of the most wellknown sights for anyone going into the fair city of LIVERPOOL, is the LEWIS'S DEPARTMENT STORE. Stood there standing, through fire, wars ,blitz, depression, and a variety of other things guaranteed to ruin anybodies day, since the 1850's. Throughout its history it has had a whole record of firsts and biggests, etc .And is basically beloved by scousers going back generations ,wether they be customers or the remarkably loyal and faithful staff. The other main landmark ,esspecially for the kids, was the 'nudie man' standing proud and semi erect over the front enterance. The people who commissioned it and the artist who sculpted it, called it LIVERPOOL RESURGENT. But to the people of Liverpool, he's always been DICKY LEWIS. The pavement under Dickies knob is the most famous meeting spot in the city. Lads n' lasses waiting for their dates. Myself included. Sharing the experiance with the likes of JOHN LENNON and CYNTHIA.
But it has been decided by the powers that be ,who, As we all know, their only thought is for the people and character of Liverpool. The councillors and the property developers who think that the old buildings in the city should be replaced by yet more shopping malls. Tiled floors ,Costas ,Starbucks and as many cloths shops as can be forced in to the new shopping/leisure facilities. Apparently, they plan to bung in a few skyscrapers into the surrounding area. A couple of towering glass tubes ,bound to draw the tourists into see the famous port of Liverpool. I like old buildings;old towns and old shops; I like old back streets and old back street pubs. I dont see why it all has to go to make way for "change!". Liverpools most famous landmark, after all is ,basically a back street and a couple of back street pubs. And a basement club called THE CAVERN.This was originally demolished by some genius. The empty space stood empty for years. Until another genius decided they'd build an exact replica, but a few feet to the right. All this to a certain four man beat combo called the BEATLES.Who,played and drank in MATTHEW STREET. The Beatles, incidently used to play at staff parties in Lewis's. They played on the roof ,as well,long before the ABBEY ROAD ROOF. And Sir MACCA was a delivery boy for them before he threw it all away and joined a band.

10 comments:

Thud said...

I love Lewis's for so many reasons I don't know were to start and as for the council policy on old buildings...well...big brown envelopes are heavily featured.

Tim Leatherbarrow said...

They should get you working on restoring the old place....Just name the number of brown envelopes as that does seem to be the currency in our climate of change. But i honestly dont think and i know you'll agree, that theres not a person ,not only in town, but the whole of the north west almost who hasnt a knowledge and fond memories of the old place. But after all its only a shop ,so lets knock it down and build another...pass the envelope!

monkey said...

where will dicky lewis go?

Cathy said...

I've never even seen Dicky Lewis. And they're going to get rid of him?? It's not as if he's a Saddam Hussein/Stalin/Lenin type figure, is he???

By the way, Tim, I think I'm up to numbers on the headlice. I suspect you may be, too. We just have SO much in common, you and I!

Tim Leatherbarrow said...

Cathy ,mon sweet, look up Lewis's,Liverpool on Google and you'll see this huge proud erection,Dicky Lewis!....I think he's lice free...Standing in the rain n' sleet naked 3 stories up for 50 years doesnt have many benefits ,but that is possibly one of them.
And to answer your question Monkey, it'll probably turn up on E-Bay. I think the postal charges will be the killer.
Tim

Cathy said...

Well, Tim, I looked up Dicky Lewis - and I've either been very spoilt during my lifetime, or that's not much of an erection. Mind you, I agree he doesn't look as though he has headlice.

I was intrigued to see that he is the handiwork of Epstein. If you do a search on Lucifer Epstein you'll get a pic of a statue which used to be in the Edwardian Tea Rooms in Birmingham Museum & Art Gallery, until they got complaints from old ladies about his todger. I'm still not entirely sure EXACTLY what they were complaining about, mind.

Tim Leatherbarrow said...

My you have been a spoilt little lady, havent you? I got my todger out in a tearoom once which illicited a few complaints, but on the whole nobody could see what the fuss was all about.
But the fuss is with ol' Dicky, if we had been young lovers in the fair city of Liverpool, chances are we would've waited with bated breath for each other right under dicky's dissappointing erection.. (for a brummie, dont forget its colder 'up north').

Cathy said...

Aha! So maybe that's why the erections on Birmingham statues cause more comment amongst the blu-rinse brigade ...

Tim Leatherbarrow said...

You may mock ,just you wait with ash clouds, global warming and climate change, its going to get a lot warmer 'up north' . The blue rinse brigade're going to hit the scouse tea rooms by the coach load within the next few years, hot warm erections with their cream teas(e).

Anonymous said...

for Lewis's sake, Dad, STOP COMPLAINING!!!!!!! I loved Lewis's too, BUT I AM NOT COMPLAINING!!!!
Never mind 50, you sound older than 60! The Little 'Un xx