Tuesday 17 October 2017

WATCH ODD PEOPLE....AS THE MOST EVIL DEADLY PEOPLE IN HISTORY WERE TOTAL WEIRDO BARNPOTS !

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kim jong un the new nutter on the block!
Throughout history the world has been run by kings ,emperors, Fakirs ,etc ,all living in the lap of luxury ,but when they got bored called up the starving subjects to march across countries to invade somebody and have a good war.

ALthough they were probably nuts ,many were actual warriors and would show their regal gob on the battlefield which ,in those long gone times actually inspired their men to fight....Can you imagine any of our leaders on the battlefield filling us with inspiration nowadays.

last century we had The Duke of Wellington fighting a clever little odd bod called Napolean ,known in legend as a dwarf with his hand inside his jacket all the time, but he ,apparently was perfectly normal sized and normal and very clever ,The Frogs (now with them farting about over Brexit ,400 men to go from Vauxhall and owning companies over her, we don't have to be nice to them ! anymore)....Well they worshipped their emperor. And probably with good reason , but then we had Waterloo....That shut les gobs!

The first world war didn't really have a central character, not until a greasy haired comb over with a snotty little moustache named ADOLPH HITLER decided to take over the world. His far right beliefs got rid of all kinds of races ,religions in the quest for land for the Germans and purity of race. Short arsed little runt who fancied himself as an artist ,but couldn't make it ,so years of war and destruction and  planned extermination of millions of men women and children just cos he got upset !

Mussollini was the dictator in charge in Italy ,a really odd baldy bulging eyed weirdo ,very animated and when he spoke you could probably hear it in England. He was jealous of Hitler and wanted the Italian military to show what they could do ,which to be honest wasn't much, aside from being beaten and surrendering in mind boggling numbers. Apparently very fond of the ladies, to show how stupid he was ,he built a series around a lake ,in fact they appear in the opening of the James Bond film, 'Quantum of Solace' in a car chase. Musso' ,as he was named in a cartoon strip named the longer tunnels after his favourite women and the shorter after the not so highly thought of ...If thats not living on the edge ,tell me what is .

Around the same time we made friends with one evil bastard JOSEPH STALIN...In charge of Russia ,he was a bear of a man who ruled with an iron paw. He and Hitler made a pact and would split what they could strip from countries they intended to over run ,but Hitler being a bad person betrayed him and invaded Russia and us Brits sent Russia as much aid as we could , the countries gradually starving but we sent supplies and lives on the Artic convoys to supply Stalin.
He shot himself in the foot as being totally ruthless and paranoid he shot a mass of his best generals , so when the Germans were at the gates of Moscow and fighting for Stalingrad it was the Russian winter that beat the Germans . Stalin ordered that anyone comes back from the front or escapes the Germans to be shot for cowardice....Alround sweet'eart he was !

But in more recent times our nutjobs are in the middle east and muslim lands . .SADDAM HUSSEIN was in charge in his lovely palaces with the goverment and military run by his mind boglingly rich family. In charge of Iraq . He fancied himself as a noble military leaderalways in military ftigues ,probably designer fitted and a beret. He was a hard leader and people were tortured and a harsh regime was ruled by his iron fist . When the good ol yanks and uk under our noble leader TONY BLAIR in vaded and got rid of poor old sad Saddam. His country decended into anarchy and chaos which it's never recovered , It seems the Muslim people are only content with an absolute bastard in charge ,as he ,like the military ,sunglass clad ,medal collecting leader in LIBYA , COLONEL GADDAFFI. He was an equal totally nuts bastard ruling with an iron fist , but he was  home for terrorists ,the Lockerbie bombing ; The SAS seige of the London Libyan embassy, etc . When he went the militant muslim chaos ensued

Iran was quite a trendy fashionable place when the SHAH ran the place ,but the extreme muslim faction under the evil eyed AYATOLLAH  moved in and strict muslim law was enforced, as well as a ruck of nuclear missiles so its believed .

And our latest totally bonkers leader of men is that hilarious KIM JONG UN in charge of NORTH KOREA who are happy to starve their people to pay for their military expansion and the nuclear missiles which are going to hit America ,"imminentally"!

Next weirdo ,with a funny hair cut, moustache, etc, just watch what you say , he could be running the worlds nuclear arsenal or concenteration camps before you know it !







Monday 16 October 2017

TRUTH; THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH LIES CHEATING N' DECEIT !....IT'S TRUTH THATS THE ABSOLUTE BASTARD!




People of the utmost moral standing ,like priests n' politicians are always preaching in the religious anp political pious way how the most important thing in life is 'THE TRUTH!'....

Coming from priests is part of the job description.....But the truth in a politicians hands , it becomes an effective tool which can be used and twisted to fit the occassion for which the honest truth is needed. Both these sets of fine upstanding pillocks of the community are able and more than ready to preach on the importance of the truth and honesty to everybody ,but themselves. A dishonest politician , never ,true as the day is green ! And the catholic church and all the other holy mafias have lots of terrible secrets under their cassocks, togas and turbans.....The simple truth is it's a load of bollocks ,truly!

Wherever you go in your daily life you are surrounded by people trying to sell you things , preach to you ,get you to vote for their parties ,all these sources of the truth are from people , companies trying to entice you with what you , or they think you want to hear ,or see to entice you into doing what the truth will drive you to.

The world and life is filled with lies and deciet from every where and we all know it and really don't mind. We know about the church ,the greasy politicians ,salesmen and advertising ,the whole world is lies disguised as the truth  and we really don't mind .

You might be faced with obvious lies about something closer to home, a relationship or something ,for instance and can be upsetting, but when the truth comes out . ...? The 'TRUTH' really is the heavy artilliary and if you think about it , unless you've already been lied to and gone through suffering and pain over something and being a victim of lies and deceit , occassionally somebody'll come and tell you 'the truth' and , hopefully joy and happiness will prevail , but not often. When the Truth becomes an important factor in the equation it is going to cause ,mind numbing pain and ussually emotional disaster. If anything is going to flatten you it is the truth over something , very rarely is truth exclusively linked to joy and happiness ,when the truth is dragged to firing position and the bitter facts reveal the true story the explosive shells of explosive facts decimate your beliefs  and trust.

At the end of the day if the truth is harmless ,the subject isn't particually important ,so the truth would've been known from the beginning  Lies wont have you slashing your wrists ,popping pills and guzzling paint stripper, but the truth can, lies cover up the truth ,but the truth doesn't cover up the lies!......Basically don't tell me the truth .....Just tell me lies about  what i want to hear ! 

Wednesday 11 October 2017

FATHERS : REMEMBER WHEN DADS LOOKED LIKE DADS , BEFORE THE CARDIGAN MARKET CRASHED !

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When i was a kid , my dad was the oldest man alive. He was that monsterous age of 30 when he took delivery me with a little help from me mam !....When i was 10 , he was 40....And still alive at that incredible age. It seems very strange now , i'm 57 not becoming a dad until i was in the last flagging days of my 30's. The daughter thinks i'm a miserable old fart ,but as to wether she thinks of me as the oldest miserable fart in the world i don't know, but i wouldn't be suprised.

In the old days couples fell in love and 'courted!'....After a long time their engagement followed by years of innocent romance then marriage and eventually the happy couple would have the post marriage 'filling of the boots' and eventually the kids'd start tumbling out. 

In them far flung innocent times dads were a lot older and looked it and wore ties around the house, as well as puffing on ciggies as they slobbed on the couch puffing on their fags in cardigan n' slippers. Then in years later they'd evolve into grandads often swapping the ciggies for a constantly smoking pipe. My dad never got to that stage ,as after a brief sojurn at her Majesty's pleasure in Strangeways Prison in Manchester he started smoking 'Rollies'...Whereas ciggies ,smouldered ,rollies fizzled like fuse wire, ash tumbling onto his lap as he frantically rolled the next one. They used to say 'Rollies' were made from dog shit n' bus tickets !.....There was a bloody good reason for that !

The years passed on and the young lovers got younger and the period of courting got shorter and dissappeared as the 'filling of the boots ' phase came around much earlier and marriages had to be hurriedly arranged before the 'signs' of the forthcoming sprog became too apparent and shame was averted. Later in the marital evolution , the birth was before the wedding , couples getting younger and younger. Now the parents are about the age of what would've been an elder brother or sister.

When we were kids we were never in the house and dads were kept from daughters ,girl problems , but were given responsibility for the boys , who are just trouble. Dads were wise and knew everything as i wasn't bothered about learning and knowledge as i just wanted to be outside running around the streets.

When we got into trouble ,i'd get a good smack off me 'awl fellah!'...Didn't bother me and i looked foreward to the day when i'd have darling kids of my own i could kick the living daylight out of ,but we live in enlightened times and we're not allowed to raise our hands....Life can be so unfair!

Nowadays the computer generation is upon us and my generation have been left way behind by our housebound computer game ,playing ,texting kids. My daughter thinks i'm a brainless turd . If i ask her to give me a hand ,you can hear the sighs, tsks ,and various respiratory sounds of impatience , like the boiler of an average steam locomotive....This combined with almost impossible rolling of bulging eyeballs....Dads are firmly in their place . In our house it was ...
1) The Dog
2)the kid
3)the missus...
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............
.............
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4) Dad

Nowadays trendy young dads are equally gened up on computers and social media ,etc. In shopping malls families aren't a couple with screaming kids , but all quiet as they mooch around all texting, so all is peace n' quiet. So daddy isn't important at all, just supplying new computer games when needed. They look smart n' trendy with tight fitting jeans and trainers ,n' footy shirt. 

The days of proper dads and dads looking like proper dads may have changed with the changing social climate and the crash in the cardigan market, but one thing that never changes is mums n' wives get something special ,kids get their ,once upon a time toys, but all soft wear now ,but dads still get the SOCKS, SHIRTS N' AFTER SHAVE ..All the time ! ,