Thursday 19 November 2009

POOR AUSTRALIA, FIRST WE DUMPED OUR CONVICTS ON THEM AND NOW ITS WORSE THEY'VE GOT OUR CELEBRITIES!

TThe winter officially started with the X-Factor and Strictly Come Dancing assaulting our tellie over every dark cold rainy windswept weekend night, but now its the official run-in to christmas as the new series of 'I'm a Celebrity , get me out of here'. Or more like "If your a celebrity , get outta here!" As a heap of nobodies and deadbeats from other reality shows;cooking and house decorating shows; A couple of once upon a time sports stars, etc, etc.Theres a couple that my long time since it had a finger on it pulse(!!!) recognised: Sam Fox, The fave page 3 years ago, i think she was ousted by Linda Lusardi, who's now an ex soap star, as Sam's an ex pop star, has anyone got, or even seen the albums?...Ah the glamour!
Hollywood legendary walking suntan ,George Hamilton with his luminous teeth. He'll be a nuisance at night as all the bugs and creepy crawlies will cross the jungle along with bigger beasties with bigger teeth, all attracted by the light of Georges teeth. But he'll be fine in one of the tasks in a pitch black cave full of rats, etc. All he has to do is smile and the cave will be lit up, bright as day.
My favourite was the news that Katie Price,a.k.a.Jordan wasgoing to return to the jungle. Last time she met her ex-husband,wonder what the jungles got in store for our super 'celeb' this time.The news footage said how she was on five times the money everyone else was on, can't you feel the love she's after already. But as she was filmed always with her blueberry/blackberry, whatever firmly clamped to her lug'ole,as a true'celeb' should. On the way to 'oz, she stopped at L.A. to get her nails done and her hair extensions, extended. Its an old S.A.S. jungle survival technique. I'm just suprised the airlines let her above 10,000 feet in case her boobies( they're not real, y' know) exploded, if one of them went off, never mind two, they'd blow a 747 out of the sky.
Jimmy White was never a sex symbol of the snooker world, but age hasn't been too kind to him.You could say he's gone to pot! And as i type away ,Joe Bugner has come on. Telling the rest about all the Australian beasties as he's lived in 'oz' for years and as EVERYTHING in Australia is specifically designed to kill you, he unintentionally scared the shit out of them.
The only bit i like is Ant n' Dec, it is very annoying as much as i try i can't hate them. In fact i watched their film ALIEN AUTOPSY, which, actually was quite good.

4 comments:

Thud said...

Not forgetting Ben Elton moving to Australia...his comedy will be sadly missed,afterall who could resist laughing everytime he said "Thatcher"...the mans a genius...isn't he?

Tim Leatherbarrow said...

HIS POLITICS, ETC,ETC GOT ON MY NERVES, LIKE MOST OF THE SO CALLED ALTERNATIVE STUFF AT THE TIME DID. BUT I'VE GOT A TAPE OF HIS LIVE TOUR FROM 1997 AND IT WAS MORE GENERAL AND HUMOROUS AND VERY FUNNY.MAYBE NOT A GENIUS, BUT A LOT CLEVERER THAN MOST OF THE 'STAND UPS WE'RE SWAMPED WITH THESE DAYS.THE OTHER DAY THEY HAD A TOMMY COOPER SPECIAL ON AND I WAS GIGGLING AWAY AND THAT WAS AT 7.00 IN THE MORNING.NOW THATS GENIUS.
THATCHER xx

Thud said...

I smiled when I read 'Tommy Cooper' now hats genius.

Cathy said...

Those poor koalas ... does the RSPCA know about this?