Monday, 27 February 2012

BACK FROM THE LAND OF PERFECTLY BOUNCING BALLS TO THE LAND OF VERY AWKWARDLY BOUNCING BALLS????


Over the last couple of days or week or so nearly two, even i have been freezing me cobblers off in the fine state of Wisconsin in the good ol' U.S.A.of America. Accompanying my hairy mate Guy Carter. It wasnt a holiday as Guy had personal business too see to so i had a lot of hanging around in cafes and suprisingly found myself in the odd pub or 46. Guts were gurgling as i existed on a diet not quite, but almost exclusively of Buffalo wings ,there i betcha didnt know buffaloes had wings did yer?...And this gastronomic aerodynamical mouth burning fest was washed down with good ol' American lager ,mainly. Every bar had telly's all over the show and every single one had sports on. Basketball seemed to be the favourite, and it seemed to be on for more hours than there was in the day. I know i'm not American as i cannot stand Basketball, unlike American football and Baseball which i just dont understand ,except that Baseball is a souped up schoolgirl s version of rounders.....Thats why the 'special relationship' is a heap of shit as the yanks do not like to be reminded of this slight observation into their national sport and any decent Englishman couldnt resist pointing out that an all-American hero ,like Babe Ruth , plays a game beloved of schoolgirls in the playground.
The basketball players ,all big blokes ,except for the manager who is white ,3 feet tall fat with grey hair in a suit shouting constantly as his team pound up n' down the court. Scores ,in the hundreds are not uncommon 187 to 188, for 'instance, ah well ,no accounting for taste i s'pose.
To be fair on the Americans i didnt see hardly any news coverage ,unlike our beloved land ,every day is a constant basketball like feed of gobshite politicians and reports on the economy, etc ,etc, blah, blachh!....They flood the screen with sports. I'm no sports nut ,but i know which i prefer, this was confirmed when the news came on when i got home.
When i did get home ,uncharectrisstically the telly was full to the gunnells of bouncing balls, but not the perfect bouncing American basketball types , but the good ol British ,or 6 nations type rugby ball bouncing here, there, hither n' thither. Players beating the living daylights out of each other and not a pad or crash helmet in sight. Arrived to see this nasty Welsh chap catch a untypical straight bounce to score a try ,then a sloppy bounce which disgracefully according to ,apparently a WELSHMAN viewing the moniters didnt go over the line, so Englands last second try was dissallowed and Wales won the Triple Crown for the first time since the dinosaurs walked the Earth or sometime ,much to my disgust, but the joy of the beloved Lynne, the missus ,gawd bless 'er welsh cotton drawers.

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