Tuesday, 8 July 2008

WHY I HATE GIRLS SITTING ON BOYFRIENDS SHOULDERS AT CONCERTS. AND WHY DOES EVERYTHING HAVE TO BE WATCHED THROUGH A MOBILE PHONE?


Just recently theres been a burst of concerts. There was the Mandella bash at Wembley and , of course there was the annual mudbath at Glasto'. But the little bits i watched was noticable, for me, anyhow by the number of arm waving girls sitting on their 'knob'ead' boyfriends shoulders. I absolutly hate them. I would like to attend the shows with a high powered rifle and blow them off their beloved 'knob'eads' shoulders. Why you may well ask do i harbour this seemingly unreasonable hatred of these bright young things in the midst of having a good time. It is a perfectly reasonable question, one which i shall endeaver to address, or even answer.
It was once upon a decade ago, that a certain Sir Paul Macca, McCartney was playing at the Kings Dock in the fair city of Liverpool. A lovely bright warm sunny evening. Macca had introduced a pile of the Beatle songs into his repetoir, after years of not being allowed to play many of them,for some Micheal Jacko'Jackson thing, or other. And, of course there was all the Wings stuff, which i've always liked. All in all it was shaping into a cracker of a show. When, Acouple of girls, about 50 yards in front were hoisted onto their beloved 'Knob'eads'shoulders. The result was that for about 50-100 yards behind them was a line of people whose exspensive view of Sir Macca was replaced by these stupid bitches waving their arms about. Eventually the waves of hatred and more then a few passed comments had the desired effect and the beloved 'knob'eads' shoulders were rapidly cleared. So, whenever i see those stupid bitches at the concerts, i see the line of people in the long 'shadow' behind them and can imagine the waves of hate hammering into her thickskinned backside.
Nowadays , aside from those aforementioned silly cows and beloved 'Knob'ead'. Nowadays, we have everybody who attends these massive spectacles, concerts, parades, space shuttle launches, etc, etc, etc. Instead of watching and enjoying the experiance, it has to be recorded and watched through a half inch square screen on a raised mobile phone. So instead of short arses like my small but perfectly formed self just having to contend with straining to see around peoples heads. The problem has been compounded by ,in addittion to their stupid fat heads, they're holding their arms with mobile phones straight up over n' above. So they have the event recorded for posterity on a tiny screen you need to squint to see and strain to hear. Why not enjoy the splendour of the moment and remember. On the mobile, it will never seem that spectacular, but your memory and imagination will, over the years add to its size and grandeur creating an experiance that could never be bettered,( even when you were actually there,) except when you are telling people about it in years to come. And i think people'd rather sit n' listen to your experiances over a drink then sit and watch your mobile phone movies.

1 comment:

The Original Wilson Brothers said...

Just imagine a short female such as myself, at a concert without seating on the main level, trying to get even a glimpse of the stage, let alone the musicians! Unless some kind gentleman lifts me up on his shoulders, just for a few minutes, I usually spend most of the show with armpits in my face . . . Actually, I have only rarely been given a 'shoulder ride'. What really irks me are the tall people, and I mean men who are 6' and over, who insist on standing in the front of the crowd at these shows. More than once I have elbowed one of these idiots and told them off.